It’s Not Weakness to Ask for Help | Ep. #21

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You dont always have to be strong and alone

Intro Today, I want to challenge the stigma of asking for help being a sign of weakness. Now, this is something that I have struggled with over the years. Anyone who knows me knows that to be true. Especially as a former Marine, I used to pride myself in my ability to be tough, be strong, be able to figure it out, do what I’ve got to do, strap up your boots and move on. And refusing to ask for help affects so many different areas of your life. Starting with the fact that it makes relationships one sided. And when that happens, when you’re always the strong one, you’re always available, you’re always the one that people can lean on, but you are unwilling or afraid to ask for help or let people see inside those moments when you feel afraid or like you’re having a hard time, you’re not willing to invite those in?

01:02 What happens over time is, it begins to slowly rob depth in that relationship. Because any long lasting relationship has a give and take. Has times where one person is the strong one and the other one needs help. And vice versa. Not only that but, if you’re trying to build something, doesn’t matter what it is. You’re trying to build a business, a happy marriage, a happy life, community. You name it. If you are not willing to ask for help, and this could be something as simple as, “Hey, I don’t have a lawnmower and I need to cut my grass. Can I borrow yours?” Or, “Hey, I feel really afraid or overwhelmed about filing my taxes. Can you help me out with that?” Whatever it may be. Well, if you don’t invite people in to those moments or to those areas of your heart, over time, it’s going to slow down the momentum of whatever that is that you’re trying to improve or build upon.

01:56 And not only that over time, it creates a self fulfilling prophecy of isolation and loneliness. We all have those parts of our life that feel like it’s too much, or we have those moments where we just need connection. And a mature man is willing to lay down his pride in his ego, and invite others into those moments. And we all need help at some point. So don’t let the lie of asking for help being a sign of weakness, be a really convenient built in excuse for you to hide behind your fear of vulnerability. Be willing to be vulnerable. Be willing to be invested in. Be willing to let others see behind the curtain or sometimes the brick wall of your heart. Real men aren’t afraid to ask for help, or to let those they’ve built trust with see the darker side that we all have. See those scary moments that we all carry. Those that thrive and that learn to enjoy this life, build relationships that walk with you through those moments. So they can also lean on you in the moments that they need it and celebrate your victories because they’ve walked through the hard times and hard moments with you.

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